Matt Fellman
09-22-2010, 08:03 PM
I've just been on a run of great questions this week.... here are a few... feel free to add you own:
So, who’s going to pay for that? (as if I know or care)
After explaining massive failures and shortcomings throughout the entire house they ask “How much will it cost to fix all of it?” (Like they’re just looking for one number and all their problems will go away – the number I usually give is an address for another house :) )
Do you think the seller should fix this?
Can I fix this myself? (as though my ESP is supposed to help me know everything they’ve done in their life and what they’re capable of… all after meeting them 10 minutes earlier)
Do you think I should fix it?
Will I ever get shocked if I don’t ground my outlets?
Will the deck collapse? (am I to assume your friends are the same size, fatter or skinnier than you? Do you like kegs of beer? How about hot tubs?)
How long until my roof leaks?
Will the appraiser see this?
Usually spoken by some old fart with a bad “comb-over” getting out of a 1983 Chevy S10 with a cord of firewood in the back in front of a run down 1920’s bungalow in a bad part of town – “Hi, thanks for coming out. I just want to make sure everything is up to code”
While starting to explain something simple like the purpose of a GFI I’m interrupted and in the span of about the 3 seconds the following questions are fired off “machine gun” style –
What do I do if it goes off?
Who do I call?
Will it stop working?
When will it stop working?
How do I fix it if it goes off?
How much will it cost to fix?
Where are these?
What do they do?
Why do they put these in my house?
How come I’ve never seen one before?
My thoughts/questions after this "assault" - Alright… forget explaining anything else.... How am I going to get out of here? Where the hell are my keys? Have I got my check yet? Where’s the nearest bar?
But still..... the worst day doing inspections is better than sitting a cubicle.
So, who’s going to pay for that? (as if I know or care)
After explaining massive failures and shortcomings throughout the entire house they ask “How much will it cost to fix all of it?” (Like they’re just looking for one number and all their problems will go away – the number I usually give is an address for another house :) )
Do you think the seller should fix this?
Can I fix this myself? (as though my ESP is supposed to help me know everything they’ve done in their life and what they’re capable of… all after meeting them 10 minutes earlier)
Do you think I should fix it?
Will I ever get shocked if I don’t ground my outlets?
Will the deck collapse? (am I to assume your friends are the same size, fatter or skinnier than you? Do you like kegs of beer? How about hot tubs?)
How long until my roof leaks?
Will the appraiser see this?
Usually spoken by some old fart with a bad “comb-over” getting out of a 1983 Chevy S10 with a cord of firewood in the back in front of a run down 1920’s bungalow in a bad part of town – “Hi, thanks for coming out. I just want to make sure everything is up to code”
While starting to explain something simple like the purpose of a GFI I’m interrupted and in the span of about the 3 seconds the following questions are fired off “machine gun” style –
What do I do if it goes off?
Who do I call?
Will it stop working?
When will it stop working?
How do I fix it if it goes off?
How much will it cost to fix?
Where are these?
What do they do?
Why do they put these in my house?
How come I’ve never seen one before?
My thoughts/questions after this "assault" - Alright… forget explaining anything else.... How am I going to get out of here? Where the hell are my keys? Have I got my check yet? Where’s the nearest bar?
But still..... the worst day doing inspections is better than sitting a cubicle.