Thread: How do I get gigs like HGTVs House Detective?

How do I get gigs where I dont have to get on the roof, crawl under a house, go into an attic, or work up a sweat? And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

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Originally Posted by imported_John Smith

How do I get gigs where I dont have to get on the roof, crawl under a house, go into an attic, or work up a sweat? And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

I think someone does your hair for you as well.

Originally Posted by imported_John Smith

And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

...Uhmm we talked to your wife about this, and she suggested you wear more clothes this time, don't know what she means by that...

Originally Posted by imported_John Smith

How do I get gigs where I dont have to get on the roof, crawl under a house, go into an attic, or work up a sweat? And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

IJS: First you will need Teflon lips to kiss all of the ass necessary to meet all of the right people to even be considered, Then, and perhaps more importantly, you will need to be a completely incompetent schmuck who would rather be an entertainer than a true professional inspector.

Those of you who do guided walking tutorials for you attention-deficient clients while in the midst of inspecting are prime candidates, and those types of clients will be your future audience.

First you need to post headshots here so we can assess if you are good looking enough, have just the right amount of trimmed facial hair and as AD mentioned have the proper lips for all that puckering.
Seriously though, I used to have a client in entertainment who told me most of it was about having someone to put your name forward and push it. I guess you could call and ask.

Originally Posted by imported_John Smith

How do I get gigs where I dont have to get on the roof, crawl under a house, go into an attic, or work up a sweat? And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

I think you have to sleep with the ugly production assistant
At least that's what I had to do. It's a bitch but ya gotta do what ya gotta do

It's all in the marketing. Doesn't matter what the product is, cost or quality. Or even if it is viable or useful.

Who'd a thunk that we would buy a rock and call it a pet? Or pay more for bottled water than we do for gasoline?

Just remember that it ain't that we get what we deserve, we get what we negotiate.

Originally Posted by imported_John Smith

How do I get gigs where I dont have to get on the roof, crawl under a house, go into an attic, or work up a sweat? And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

Well

The saying goes ..... The least physical work you do the more you make ... We just do it the wrong way. Home inspection may be on the minimum end of physical but I guess it is still to much.

Originally Posted by Markus Keller

First you need to post headshots here so we can assess if you are good looking enough, have just the right amount of trimmed facial hair and as AD mentioned have the proper lips for all that puckering.
Seriously though, I used to have a client in entertainment who told me most of it was about having someone to put your name forward and push it. I guess you could call and ask.

I think they call those "Publicists" and "Agents".

Seriously, to sell usually needs some sort of "gimick" as well as some sort of "appeal".

Perhaps a spinning (a la barbershop) "dancers" brass pole, some practice on it, and a tripod mounted camera + You-tube = you could DIY it and hopefully go viral - let the morning news, news magazines & Hollywood come to you! (Don't forget to send 5% consultant fee this way when you get the deal).

P.S. There's always sweat involved, magic of hollywood doesn't always let you see it.

Originally Posted by H.G. Watson, Sr.

I think they call those "Publicists" and "Agents".

Seriously, to sell usually needs some sort of "gimick" as well as some sort of "appeal".

Perhaps a spinning (a la barbershop) "dancers" brass pole, some practice on it, and a tripod mounted camera + You-tube = you could DIY it and hopefully go viral - let the morning news, news magazines & Hollywood come to you! (Don't forget to send 5% consultant fee this way when you get the deal).

How about the freak show Realtors in California. I think the show is called the million dollar sale or something like that. 2 of them are openly gay and the third is a serious gay wanna be with his hair combed forward all around his face like a werewolf, gay sounding, annoying unbelievable that anyone wanted to take this guy seriously, to sell them a home to them.

Nothing agaunst gays folks. Just these three guys on the show.

They cannot be serious showing freak show garbage like that on television. AND they actually have enough folks watching the freak show to keep it on the air.

Total insanity.

Ted
I've never seen or even heard of it. Sounds like you watch it often. Tell us more about it.

Originally Posted by imported_John Smith

How do I get gigs where I dont have to get on the roof, crawl under a house, go into an attic, or work up a sweat? And can I get someone to rotate around me with a camera while I put on my toolbelt.

Was going to go blue: "a gig 'getting it on', on the roof...someone rotate around me with a camera..." but that too would likely result in "working up a sweat...." etc. <<slapping myself>> went with "gimick" and "appeal" instead.

Ask Steve Ramos HGTV's house detective.
Home Inspector Santa Rosa, CA Home Inspection Service, Mold Inspection Service/

Steve came to the Great Lakes Chapater of ASHI, good presentation and nice guy.

Originally Posted by Rick Vernon

Steve came to the Great Lakes Chapater of ASHI, good presentation and nice guy.

I can't get him to come to a CREIA chapter meeting and he lives nearby.

P.S. There's always sweat involved, magic of hollywood doesn't always let you see it.

HG: And an awful lot of that perspiration occurs while either in the prone or supine position.

Originally Posted by Rick Vernon

Ask Steve Ramos HGTV's house detective.
Home Inspector Santa Rosa, CA Home Inspection Service, Mold Inspection Service/

Steve came to the Great Lakes Chapater of ASHI, good presentation and nice guy.

RV: Looks like just another INACHI Craker Jack-credentialed slacker riding on the IR wave of cupidity.