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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Fletcher, NC
    Posts
    28,042

    Default 'Twas the night before Christmas ...

    ... oh, wait, that is another story.

    'Twas the night before Frances
    When all through the state
    Not a gas pump was pumping
    Not a store open late

    All the plywood was hung
    On the windows with care
    Knowing that a hurricane
    Soon would be there

    The children were ready
    With flashlights in hand
    While bands from the hurricane
    Covered over the land

    And mama with her Mag-Lite
    And I in my cap
    Had just filled the bath tub
    For flushing our crap

    When out on the lawn
    There arose such a clatter
    I sprang from the closet
    To see what was the matter

    The trees on the fence
    And the neighbor's roof torn
    Gave the fear of us dying
    In this terrible storm

    With a little wind gust
    So lively and quick
    I remembered quite clearly
    Our walls weren't brick

    More rapid than eagles
    Her courses they came
    And she whistled, and wafted
    And surged all the same
    Off shingles! Off sidings!
    Off rooftops! Off power!
    Down trees! Down fences!
    Down trailers! Down towers!

    In the center of Florida
    She continued to maul
    Screaming Blow Away!
    Blow Away! Blow Away All!

    As wind ripped and tossed
    The debris through the sky
    I peeked out the shutters
    At cars floating by

    So go to the safe-room
    My family did do
    With a portable radio
    And batteries too

    And then, in a twinkling
    I heard on the set
    The end was not coming
    For a few hours yet!

    As I calmed down the kids
    And was turning around
    Through the window it came
    With a huge crashing sound

    A tree branch it was
    All covered in soot
    The wind blew it smack-dab
    On top of my foot

    A bundle of twigs
    Now lay in a stack
    And my living room looks
    Like it was under attack

    The wind - how it howled!
    The storm - very scary!
    Myself and the family
    Were all too unwary
    The dangers of hurricanes
    Are serious, you know
    They are taken for granted
    As Frances did show

    With the winds dying down
    And the danger beneath
    I noticed my tool shed
    Was missing its sheath

    So I grabbed my last tarp
    And nailed it on down
    Then I got in my car
    And I headed to town

    The traffic was awful
    And stores had no ice
    My five gallon cooler
    Would have to suffice

    Generators were scarce
    Not one left in town
    There were trees on the roads
    And power lines down

    FEMA was ready
    With people to work
    Electrical companies
    Came in from New York

    And in the midst of
    This peculiar routine
    Another storm emerged

    Named Hurricane Jeanne

    I sprang to the car
    And gave my family a whistle
    Then away we all went
    Like a Tomahawk missile

    You could hear us exclaim
    As we drove out of sight
    "The hell with this place,
    New York seems just right!"

    (author unknown)

    Similar Threads:
    Inspection Referral
    Jerry Peck
    Construction/Litigation/Code Consultant - Retired
    www.AskCodeMan.com

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Columbus GA
    Posts
    3,747

    Default Re: 'Twas the night before Christmas ...

    Jerry, you ol softy you.
    You do have the Christmas spirit, a little.

    Wish you and your family all the best.

    ' correct a wise man and you gain a friend... correct a fool and he'll bloody your nose'.

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